How to push fear and self-doubt aside to welcome new opportunities.
What do you see when you look at this black-and-white photo? It may be a snapshot of military training to some, but I see myself and another soldier digging deep as we strive to join the ranks of one of the world's most elite fighting forces: the U.S. Army Rangers.
I was among the first three women to graduate from Ranger School after the Army began admitting female soldiers in 2015. When I first learned the program accepted me, I knew I had to do everything possible to ensure my success; this included getting a haircut.
Sitting in the stylist's chair, I explained I was attending a military school and had to cut my hair short. Still, my stylist attempted to talk me out of it, but I remained resolute. I told him my plans to donate my hair to Locks of Love, which was a better approach. But, ultimately, he lost his nerve and said he couldn't do it. So, I picked up the scissors and began cutting my hair. After all, nothing screams "all-in" like buzzing your head.
As the first female Ranger candidates, we had to overcome the physical and mental challenges of training, grapple with the weight of making history, and navigate shifting boundaries, such as passing the Army's two-week Ranger Training and Assessment Course, which had been optional up until our arrival.
Still, I didn't let these challenges hold me back. The alternative was returning home and being reminded of my failure every time I attempted to run my fingers through my now-missing hair. So, when my feet were bleeding through my socks, or my heart ached from missing my family, all I had to do was think, "I shaved my head for this," and I was right back in the fight.
In my new book, Delete the Adjective: A Soldier's Adventures in Ranger School, I reflect on my journey and the lessons I learned. Below the surface of my stories and anecdotes exists an important question: What are you willing to do to achieve your goals? Another approach is to think about your own "cut my hair" moments—those small yet pivotal decisions that have a way of shaping our lives.
Fear and self-doubt can rob us of opportunity during these crucial moments, causing us to believe our goals are too hard to achieve, but the Roman philosopher Seneca explained, "It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult."
Whether you're considering running your first triathlon or accepting a job you've worked hard to earn, my advice is to go for it. There are times when we must choose the difficult path; when those times arrive, be ready to do what it takes to achieve your dreams.
This article is an installment of the Men’s Journal Everyday Warrior, a series featuring insightful advice, key interviews, and useful tips to help you live an impactful life built on growth and continual learning.
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